Around this time last year, it was a life changing stage of my life. Yeah, a big shift of my daily life and my comfort zone. Hahaha.
Even moving to China is already beyond my imagination because life as a Chinese descendent already hard and I need to live as a Chinese here. Hahaha.
Actually, I thought that I am good and I am okay. I am not stress anymore and everything I did seems okay to me. But, when the time COMES, I could not passed this stage. Yeah, it is been hard. I only want to be alone and my thoughts are saying that no one care about you. Hahaha.
But, I believe that I will always have someone who will be there for me. Hahaha. And I know they will be there. Hahaha.
After think about that, I think mental disease is more complicated and it is harder to distinguish between healthy and not healthy. Actually, the world is getting worse not because of the war but because of what people say about the others. When people opinion can change the other personality and it is like the world force us to do that.
I scared if I know there were a demonstration or a disaster but I know there will be a way to survive and it can be prevented. But, the comment or people opinion cannot be controlled and we could not prevent them from being able to hurt us. Hahaha.
It is sad but it is true. I even more scared to face the disappointment and complain than the real disaster. Hahaha. Life is hard not only because we couldn't do that but because the environment and the community around us make us more insecure with the future.
Don't blame yourself. That might be sound selfish but it is better than not taking care of yourself
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