Wuhan Corona Virus: Am I need to stay of leave?

Updating about my previous post, my flight was canceled. And I am decided to stay here in China.

So, in this post I will give you the reason why you need to stay and why you need to leave!

I hate when people said that going back home is a selfish and we don't love China. Everyone have their own perspective and I think we need to respect their choice. 

If you are still think about leaving or not, maybe you can check the list below:

1. Do you feel panic and anxiety during this period? If the answer is yes, I suggest you to go. As soon as possible. We don't know what will happen tomorrow and when there is no access anymore that will be harder for you to be in a good condition because your thoughts are toxic now

2. How's you body? The only one who know your body is you, if you are not care with your health, don't want to eat healthy food or consume vitamin. And you know that your body cannot bear that. Leave now! Because this disease might be easier to catch by a person with weak immune system.

3. Do you think you will be able to face this problem if the situation is getting worse? It will be stimulate your brain for a worse case one. If you cannot get through that thoughts that will be hard if that happen for real.

So, please consider yourself before the others. You are the only one who know the best for you. It is not selfish and that's normal. 

For me, 

I told my mom if suddenly I cannot go back next week just pray for me. That's the only thing I told my mom. She insisted to find the ticket back but I said I am OK. And after I am checking myself. It is not bad. I know the situation is really chaos now. I know if there will be a missunderstanding. 

Don't let your emotion come first, 

During this period stay calm and use your brain not your heart. 

It is good to follow your heart, but don't let your emotions make you felt bad about this situation now. 

Outbreak Disease: Wuhan Corona Virus

When I looked back to my Facebook I saw that the Zika Virus outbreak also happened during this time. But, that time I only heard and read from the paper.

This time, I am here in China.

Only like 300 km away from Wuhan the first place of the outbreak. is it that bad?

Of course, till now almost 20,000 cases in whole China. Like 300 something in my city alone.

But, if we compared with the number of Chinese citizens, 20k is nothing anyway. So, don't panic!

First, 

this disease can be heal by themselves with the note that the people have a good immune system and they know how to treat themselves especially medical personnel

Second, 

If you do what you should do and obey with all of the rules. I never felt this healthy within my 2.5 years stay here. I took vitamin, I ate a lot of healthy food, and I think I have a really good sleeping pattern lately.

Third,

Don't panic! Most of people is really scare with that disease. Sometimes they over react and actually because of the control every day and every time we go out, they are afraid that might be they are not healthy enough because they will take the suspected one to the hospital directly. I think this problem also like a kind of battle of physiological things.

Forth, 

Please respect anyone who decide to stay and the one who decide to leave. We have our own arguments and reasons for that. For me, firstly I don't want to go back. Yeah I am not really care and I can stay in my room for whole day anyway. But, my family said to me that it will be better for me to go back and actually, I also need to renew my passport and the embassy also suggested to do that in Indonesia. And I never meet with my dad after my dad suddenly had a heart disease. After I am thinking about that reason, maybe going back home for a while will be a better choice.

I also don't want to spread the virus. That's why I am trying to do my best to protect myself. Going back to our home country doesn't mean that we don't care about China or we will infected people there if we are going back to our country. You say that we are selfish? What a weird way of thinking. Please respect the other too.

Let me share a case, 

One of my friend is really worry. 

I think by staying in China will make his condition worse, why we need to keep him in China. He might be not sick because of the virus, but he might be sick because of his thoughts. Do you think that will be good for him to stay? In my PERSPECTIVE, I say No. Not only one people felt like that a lot of people might be felt like that too. Even I still can joke about the disease while they cannot do that anymore.

Is it safe to go back from China?

Of course, it's a 50:50.

But, I believe that if you protect yourself and take care of yourself during your stayed in China. You will be okay! 

Writer (?)

Previously, I had tried to applied as the writer for one of famous magazine in Indonesia. They only said to me like this.

Writing as hobby and as the job is different. After that I was thinking maybe writer is not my way. Hahaha. 

But after time passed by, I know that I love writing and I love to share my thoughts through writing.

I am starting to reading more book recently and due to all of things happen to me I think I become wiser and more mature. Hahaha. 

After I saw some of my posts from the past, I think it was about me and me. But, that the process and the way of learning. Hahaha. 

And I think that everyone have their own meaning for a lot of things. I am not trying to make them to agree with my opinion because that's mine. 

I think I will try to post some of my thoughts when I am bored with this activity and I will write my real thoughts about living and studying in China. Yeah, this time will be the full story and it will be my last year so it will be more accurate because I did all of that in the past. Sometimes I also not remember clearly but I know that my life in China is beautiful indeed! 

Don't judge someone by their past

This time, I would like to share my thoughts about the perspective of people around me. Past is in the past and even yesterday was a past. This year I am trying to not judging someone by their past even what they did recently. 

It's hard because my head keep noticing the difference between me and them but I need to keep myself in a positive action. It is not only a positive mind set because most of the mindset were fake and that's only the way to fake the situation.

Why I said don't judge someone by their past? Because the past that we saw maybe not the REAL one. I know it sounds like I am trying to accept anyone around me. But, it is not! By trying to not judging someone I learn to separate the people in my life. I am starting to make a border yeah a thin line with someone who I think I don't need to interact with. It is not arrogant, but that the way to not judge someone. When you know more about someone, that will be easier for you to judge that people.

I hope you have a great week. Let's spread the positivity! 

Haruskah ku pulang?

Ini adalah post pertama di tahun 2020. Yah, waktu kepulanganku semakin dekat, ada rasa berat di hati untuk pulang karena belum rela untuk menghadapi kenyataan namun disisi lain hati ini sudah menangis ingin pulang.

Banyak pandangan yang terbentuk setelah tinggal di Cina selama 3 tahun, ada image yang baik dan ada image yang buruk. Tapi akhirnya gw belajar bahwa setiap orang itu punya preferensi dan bahkan caranya dalam menghadapi hidup.

Tentu pulang ke Indo pasti ada lebih nya, tapi ketika melihat keadaan kok jadi pesimis yah. Sebenernya aku yakin ga semenakutkan itu tapi aku lelah dengan hidup penuh kompetisi ini dan bahkan ku yang sangat kompetitif ini pun lelah untuk bersaing.

Ketika ku pikirkan masa" disini.

Berat, yah berat. Bahkan kadang ku menangis dalam kesunyian. Semua harus di tanggung sendiri. Ga ada orang yang bisa di percaya, hidup juga sebenernya lebih enak sih. Banyak hal yang bisa di syukuri dan banyak orang yang bahkan membuat gw nyaman tinggal disini. Tapi, cukup ku harus mengakhiri segala cerita ini untuk memulai cerita yang baru. Apakah akan berbeda? Tentu tidak, bos, atasan, temen kerja semua akan pada posisi yang sama siklus yang sama juga. Yang berbeda cuma cara kita melihat masalah itu.

Cape lagi

Ngeluh lagi

Mau nyerah lagi

Pasti itu mah pasti

Tapi itulah hidup, ga selalu di atas ga selalu di bawah. Positive nya kita jadi lebih bisa bersyukur negative nya yah itu kita jadi hanya memikirkan diri sendiri. 

Kalo misalkan ditanya sekarang

I choose money over passion 

Why? Buat gw passion itu akhirnya cuma iming" dan akhirnya alesan kita buat klo ga suka bilang aja ga passion. Sebenernya passion kita apa aja belom tentu kita tau. Apa klo kalian suka sesuatu itu passion? Berapa lama kalian akan suka sama hal itu?

Ketika pulang ke Indonesia realita teman" udh di posisi yang lebih baik, jadi pengangguran lagi, omongan tetangga yang ga abis". Pasti setidaknya membuat gw Merasa sedikit minder dengan keadaan. Sampe sekarang gw masih nyesel kok ninggalin kerjaan. Boong klo gw blg gw rela semua usaha itu orang yg nikmatin, tapi kalo gw masih disana mungkin gw ga akan jadi gw yang sekarang.

Pulang

Itu yang selalu terlintas di pikirkan gw. Disaat dulu kepengen pulang dan sekarang mau menghindar pulang, tapi disini pun ga mau. Hahaha. Kaya pepatah hidup segan mati tak mau.

Semoga di akhir cerita menjadi anak master degree ini akan ada jawaban yang lebih baik dan lebih bisa menikmati hidup dan mengurangi hal" negative 😁

SOUND INSIDE MY HEAD

Around this time last year, it was a life changing stage of my life. Yeah, a big shift of my daily life and my comfort zone. Hahaha.

Even moving to China is already beyond my imagination because life as a Chinese descendent already hard and I need to live as a Chinese here. Hahaha.

Actually, I thought that I am good and I am okay. I am not stress anymore and everything I did seems okay to me. But, when the time COMES, I could not passed this stage. Yeah, it is been hard. I only want to be alone and my thoughts are saying that no one care about you. Hahaha.

But, I believe that I will always have someone who will be there for me. Hahaha. And I know they will be there. Hahaha.

After think about that, I think mental disease is more complicated and it is harder to distinguish between healthy and not healthy. Actually, the world is getting worse not because of the war but because of what people say about the others. When people opinion can change the other personality and it is like the world force us to do that.

I scared if I know there were a demonstration or a disaster but I know there will be a way to survive and it can be prevented. But, the comment or people opinion cannot be controlled and we could not prevent them from being able to hurt us. Hahaha.

It is sad but it is true. I even more scared to face the disappointment and complain than the real disaster. Hahaha. Life is hard not only because we couldn't do that but because the environment and the community around us make us more insecure with the future.

Don't blame yourself. That might be sound selfish but it is better than not taking care of yourself

Mental Health

Kali ini mental health nya lebih ke verbal abuse daripada physical abuse yah. Sebenernya dari satu sisi gw merasa abis orang nya bunuh diri baru lah di buat thread trus ato di bilang RIP buat apa sih.

Dulu pas kasus Jonghyun, gw smpet ikutan tuh. Tapi mgkn krn wktu itu gw jga smpet ada di fase yang sama, dimana pas udh mulai winter mood gw berubah drastis, apalagi biasanya hidup di negara tropis kan.

Kebetulan kasus gw tuh dulu juga verbal abuse, dan jujur aja kadang kalo gw lagi merasa stress atau tertekan kadang gw juga masih muntah" dan masih ada lah gejala bekas taon lalu itu. Udh setaon loh, kok ga sembuh" sih? Menurut gw selalu ada improvement sih, tapi yah itu luka itu akan selalu membekas sih.

Jujur aja, kalo orang ga kenal gw mereka akan menganggap yah gw baik" aja bahkan gw itu kan punya tendency terlihat ceria di depan orang. Jadi emang self protection gw yah untuk selalu terlihat ceria.

Kadang gw bingung kenapa sih idup lu sbnernya ga sgtunya kok, bhkan tekanan gw lbh tinggi kenapa lu stress sih. Kdang bahkan gw masih mikir begitu, tapi yah tiap orang kan emang beda kan yah. Dan mekanisme mereka menghadapi masalah juga berbeda.

Sebenernya verbal abuse tuh apa sih? Kalo dari gw sndiri yah, apapun yang bisa membuat seseorang terluka, tertekan atau stress dapat gw kategorikan sbg verbal abuse, bahkan menurut gw pujian yang akhirnya memberikan demand tinggi aja itu bisa jd verbal abuse buat gw krn akhirnya gw tertekan thd itu. Sebenernya ga salah dong, orang di puji, di bilang bagus" aja. Tapi karena itu mungkin lingkungan kita jadi ga suka, akhirnya abuse dgn cara yang lain.

Tapi mungkin yah itu mekanisme gw, krn dulu udh begitu mau sebaik apapun orang dan memuji gitu membuat gw lebih takut untuk melakukan sesuatu bahkan gw berusaha buat ya udh gw tunda aja dulu, gw takut kalo di demand lebih, wlpn di bilang lambat, tapi gw merasa ya udah drpd gw di demand lebih lagi. Is it hard? Tentuuu.

Setelah itu, gw lagi mikir apakah yang gw perbuat itu juga buat orang stress? Tapi gw merasa itu untuk kebaikan dia juga. Nahh, ini juga nih yang gw belajar yah. Ga semua yg lu anggap baik bsa di anggap baik oleh orang lain :) hahaha.

Jangan terlalu baik, tapi yah emang dasar nya gw ga bisa klo ga peduli, kesannya kaya mencampuri sih akhirnya, tapi yah itu akhirnya gw lelah sndiri dan biarkanlah mereka dgn caranya sendiri. Hahaha

Ini semakin ngawur yahh. Saya Bobo dlu dehh. Nanti di revisi lagii. Hahaha